GIVEAWAY!! Lucky Us by Amy Bloom

Exciting news people -- the blog is entering the uncharted territories of book reviews and (wutwut) giveaways. Yah, you read that correctly, a chance to win free stuff. No it's not for a clutch or a bauble of the costume variety, but for the gift that lasts the duration of a trip to the beach: a book. Hehe. And not just any book, but a lovely tale that is part family saga, part love story and part historical fiction. Because I'm a selfless person who enjoys the simple pleasures of reading and lying on the beach, I spent last weekend in my brand spankin' new tie dyed bathing suit immersing myself in Amy Bloom's yet-to-hit-shelves novel Lucky Us so I could put my literary two cents in and give you a chance to win the book. Thank me later. Here's the skinny on the novel:

Bare bones down to it (is that a saying? It should be), Lucky Us is a story of two half-sisters, Eva and Iris. The book takes place throughout the 1940s, so not so coincidentally, the happenings of World War II are implicated in the plot. Thrilling. Eva and Iris share a dad who kind of has a Gatsby-esque chasin' the American dream one con-at-a-time type thing going on. Needless to say, he's not much to hang around the Midwest for, so the two gals hit the road for bright lights big city Hollywood, USA. The sisters' journey doesn't end in Hollywood, in fact, one might argue that's where the story begins. Throughout the book, the ladayz pick up a few new friends (who lend themselves to family members) and ultimately reinvent themselves. If you liked A Tree Grows in Brooklyn and Water for Elephants, then you'll like Lucky Us. Trust me. (I trust you, Jack. You jump, I jump, am I right?)

Okay, now the fun part. You get a chance to win a copy of the book, which doesn't come out until July 29. Not the lightly-used paperback copy I read, but a new one. Oh yah. Here's how: leave a COMMENT. Seriously you guys, comments are an effing gold standard in the dog eat dog blogosphere. Tell me what's on your summer reading list and you'll be entered for a chance to win. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take, so take a chance on me (if you change your mind, I'm the first in line) and enter the giveaway.

Okay bye, TGIF, and not just any Friday, but the LONGEST DAY OF THE YEAR FRIDAY!!! (Forthcoming post on #PublicSchoolSummer. What's that, you ask? You think you know but you have no idea.)

UPDATE!! THE GIVEAWAY HAS ENDED. Thanks to all 11 of you who entered, you wouldn't have done so had I not bombarded you with personal emails and texts, but thank you. Congratulations to a @TheVoiceTrumpet (that's a nascent viral Twitter account) for winning. Doo doo doo.

The Tale of the Mismatching Bathing Suit

Today's Sunday Styles section was underwhelming--the Modern Love piece was depressing (most are, but this one wasn't as emotionally heartwrenching as the best ones tend to be), the featured wedding had a boring love story, and the rest of the wedding announcements were unremarkable. The only thing that stood out was that the bride in the featured wedding was a bikini designer, which got me to thinking about, duh, bikinis.

As anyone who's gone to the beach with me in the past five years knows, I've been wearing the same mismatching bathing suit for way. too. long. I got the bandeau top at a Tibi sample sale a few years ago. It's a purple floral print that was $20, and I didn't see any matching bottoms in sight but bought it anyway. The bottom half of my, uh, ensemble is a a basic bikini bottom that I found in the sale section at the freestanding Lord & Taylor that divides (at least for me) the town that I grew up in in half. My family moved from that town five years ago, so I've been wearing the bottoms for at least five years.

Every year, when the end of May rolls around, I plan to buy a new bathing suit. I go to a fancy department store or bathing suit boutique and look around only to walk out empty handed and appalled at how overpriced bathing suits are. Eff that, I'd rather put that money to more substantial fabric.

Around this time last year, my friend and I went to the Mara Hoffman sample sale in Nolita. Both of us had long admired Mara Hoffman prints, and at least for me, the only thing resembling employment on my resume was a few (not even--one and a half) unpaid internships, so if I wanted one of her suits, I had to go the sample sale route. We very much were not the only people in New York who heard about the sale, and we spent two hours shuffling between plastic bins of bathing suits and a room full of half-naked women trying them on. I found a suit, the top and bottom didn't match but it would do. As we were waiting to pay, I saw a hidden rack of (DRUMROLL DRUMROLL): patterned pants. They were eccentric and I couldn't imagine life without them, so I examined each pair from where I was standing just as people grocery shop from their place in line at Trader Joe's. I chose one not by pattern but by size because when it comes to eccentric prints, it really doesn't matter which you choose. Point of the story has to do with opportunity cost (I think). I had to give up the bathing suit for the pants because I had no income at the time and I was set to start an underpaid job the next week. I knew I'd wear the pants more, which I have because they are awesome.

So, I spent last summer in my stupid Tibi-Lucky Brand mismatching bathing suit, and I tanned on the Jersey Shore in it last weekend too, so I don't feel good about the odds of a wearing a new bathing suit this summer. It's my signature look. It's so ugly.

Q&A: Summer Sandals

Hola snitchez and bienvenue to the first installment of my sartorial advice column. Two of my friends suggested I start this because I'm often on the receiving end of longwinded messages regarding what to wear and where to buy thangz. That sentence wasn't intended to position myself as a holier-than-thou consumer of clothes, but more of a testament to the fact that 87 percent of my daily thoughts are related to items with which I'd like to adorn myself. Soooo ask me anything, and know that if I don't have the answer off the top of my head, I'll take pleasure in finding it out for you.

Without further ado, the first Q from a friend and reader under the alias of Closed Toed and Confused:

"I'm in the midst of a sartorial conundrum. I need some summer sandals but am unsure of which to buy. I've never been much of a flip flop girl (too beachy) and have steered more towards the gladiator sandal. But as I think about a new purchase, I'm left wondering--is the gladiator dead? I'm pondering a pair of Birkenstocks right now but I'm pretty sure the rainbow straps I want scream gay pride."

Okay, well I love Birkenstock Arizonas. I've had the same pair since 2005 though I haven't worn them consistently over the years. I got the hint that they'd be coming back in style when I saw them in surf shops in Biarritz during summer 2k11, and as we all know, the French are legit forerunners when it comes to fahshan. Even though Birkenstocks are on the feet of French citoyens and models walking ready-to-wear runways, everyone shouldn't go buy a pair. If you dress hippie or dowdy on top, wearing Birkenstocks on your feet won't de-frumpify your look. So if you're going to wear Birkenstocks, you should do so with well-pedicured toes, skinny jeans or rolled boyfriend jeans, or a shirt dress/skirt. And rainbow straps equals #shinebrightlikeaNO. I happen to know that the reader who sent in the question has an affinity for navy blue, so I think a navy blue suede pair might complement her wardrobe. Or maybe in white or a pastel shade? The color you choose depends on how well it will mesh with the overall tone of your wardrobe.

I don't think gladiators are dead, but I think Jesus sandals could be a good compromise between them and Birkenstocks. Jesus sandals have the bulky look that is hashtag trending right now and the advantage of being a classic piece because they'll definitely come in handy when you're on a senior citizen tour of India in fifty years. I like this pair from Freda Salvador. I should also probably note that I'm not sure of the exact definition of Jesus sandals, but I once saw a pair of shoes at the leather market in Florence for 30 euros that had straps going over and around the foot, and since they reminded me of Jesus Christ Superstar, I called them Jesus sandals.

Finally, if you're loyal to the gladiator, you might want to think about investing in a pair of K. Jacques tropeziennes. Tropezienne shoes will never be out of style, and though I don't own a pair, I imagine they get better with age. You can also get them with rainbow straps that don't shout gay pride.