You guys, Patagucci

We're in the throes of sale hysteria. How have you embraced it?

I, for one, couldn't wait until cyber Monday to take advantage of the online shopping deals that have greeted me every time I've checked my email this past week, so I logged into my newly-activated United Mileage Plus portal yesterday to ensure that with every dollar I spent online, I would receive 2 airline miles. If that's not killing two birds with one stone, I don't know what is. With a few clicky clicks, I bought myself a new fleece that was 30% off to add to my Patagucci collection.

Similar to my fascination with sneakers, I've always been attracted to members of the opposite sex who wear Patagonia jackets and whose first name is commonly a last name. I imagine that I bought my first Patagonia fleece from the men's section of Urban Outfitters 6 years ago because I had a crush on a guy who wore a similar one. It was a retro-looking royal blue fleece with kelly green piping that lasted me well into my freshman year of college. At my small liberal arts school, I became acquainted with hordes of boarding school alumni who wore pastel Patagonia fleeces, and I wanted in. I traded my retro pullover for a plushy mint green one, which I wore everyday for two months before realizing that I could be wearing more becoming tops that didn't come in toothpaste shades.

It wasn't until a couple of weeks ago that I fell back into a Patagonia stupor. A friend and I stopped at my neighborhood Patagonia store while taking my dog for a Sunday afternoon walk. Within one minute upon entering, the three of us lost our cool and became all sorts of overwhelmed by the sheer attractiveness of the store associates. As bearded James Franco look-a-likes tried to play in-store frisbee with my lackadaisal dog, I remembered why I had started shopping at Patagonia in the first place. I walked out of the store with the intention of returning the next week a little more put together, but not before deciding that there must exist a Patagonia scouting team that looks for attractive men to send free fleeces.

Below, a flashy Patagonia fleece paired with some equally flashy sale finds. Happy cyber Monday!!

Patagonia fleece, Joseph leather trousers, Holst + Lee necklace, Maison Martin Margiela bracelet, Alexander Wang oxfords, Equipment blouse, Prada wing tip sneakers, Pierre Hardy clutch